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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/26401867">These High Walls Never Broke My Soul</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/OverlyObsessed223/pseuds/OverlyObsessed223'>OverlyObsessed223</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>umbrella academy one-shots where people give a damn about klaus [5]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>The Umbrella Academy (TV)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Angst, Fluff and Angst, Ghosts, Hurt Klaus Hargreeves, Hurt/Comfort, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, Klaus Hargreeves Deserves Better, Klaus Hargreeves Needs A Hug, Minor Violence, Number Five | The Boy Has Issues, Protective Ben Hargreeves, Reginald Hargreeves' A+ Parenting, Sober Klaus Hargreeves, Trapped</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-09-11</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-09-11</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-06 11:13:23</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>7,000</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/26401867</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/OverlyObsessed223/pseuds/OverlyObsessed223</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>“Klaus, we’ve been here long enough,” Ben yells above the voices of the dead. “We’ve proved Five wrong, so let’s go!”</p><p>Klaus doesn’t respond, and for a moment Ben worries his brother can’t hear him, but then Klaus nods in agreement, moving to stand on unsteady legs. Ben feels himself deflate with relief as Klaus stumbles over to the mausoleum door, ready to leave this place and hopefully never come back. Hopefully this experience is enough to convince Klaus to stay away for the rest of his life, because Ben doesn’t think he could bear coming back here again. </p><p>Klaus pushes on the mausoleum door, but the door doesn’t move. Ben frowns. “Push harder, Klaus,” Ben tells him, hating how useless he feels watching Klaus push on the door. “It’s just super heavy, right?”</p><p>Klaus pushes harder this time, squeezing his eyes shut as he presses his entire body against the door, the veins in his arms becoming visible as he does. </p><p>The door doesn’t budge. </p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Ben Hargreeves &amp; Klaus Hargreeves, Diego Hargreeves &amp; Klaus Hargreeves, Number Five | The Boy &amp; Klaus Hargreeves</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>umbrella academy one-shots where people give a damn about klaus [5]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/1890268</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>25</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>1000</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Collections:</b></td><td>Semi-Functional Adults</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>These High Walls Never Broke My Soul</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Y'all. I have so many story ideas for this fandom, my list is so freaking long, and I'm slowly making my way through it. I'm pretty busy with college classes too, but by GOD I'm gonna make that list disappear eventually—though I'm pretty sure I'm doing whumptober this year so that'll slow things down too, but I'm excited for that challenge, the prompts look like so much fun. For anyone who's following The Only Bridge There Ever Was, I should have an update up this weekend.</p><p>Anyways, enough of that, enjoy this one shot, I hope you like it :)</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“Um, hey, Klaus? Where are we going?”</p><p>Klaus glances over his shoulder at his ghost brother, who’s following him from close behind, as they make their way down the cracked, beaten sidewalk. Ben’s watching him closely as they walk, his voice curious with a hint of nervousness mixed in, but Klaus elects not to answer for the time being. Instead, he hugs his arms around his middle as he continues to stumble along the path, shivering even though it’s not even cold out tonight.</p><p>Klaus figures Ben must have at least a suspicion about where they’re heading—it’s a route Klaus has taken hundreds of times in his life, and Ben had tagged along more than once after he’d died and became a ghost. Still, Klaus doesn’t want to say it out loud, already feeling the panic building up inside of him, every step he takes sending a pang of fear and anxiety coursing through his body. Every part of him wants to turn around and go back to the Academy, but Klaus continues to fight the temptation.</p><p>This is something he <em> has </em> to do. </p><p>Surprisingly, Ben doesn’t press for an answer, simply letting them fall back into silence, the only sounds being Klaus’ footsteps and the faint sounds of the city that lies just a mile back from where they are. </p><p>The voices of the dead get significantly louder as they finally reach the entrance to the Cemetery. </p><p>“Klaus?” Ben frowns, peering nervously through the large, fancy gates that are cracked open just enough for them to be able to slip inside. Those gates have never been closed, not in Klaus’ lifetime at least, probably because it’s been abandoned for decades now. He can hear the screams, the wails, the sobs, and he can’t believe he’s back here after almost fifteen years, <em> on his own volition</em>. “What are we doing here, Klaus?”</p><p>He almost decides to run away, and he knows that Ben wouldn’t judge him for doing so, but Five’s furious, disappointed face is burned into his mind, keeping him standing here, his limbs frozen as he stares into his version of Hell. </p><p>“I shouldn’t be afraid anymore,” Klaus whispers. Another shiver passes through him, and he hugs himself even tighter. </p><p>“You what? I don’t—oh,” Ben’s eyes widen as the realization dawns on him. “This is about what Five said earlier, isn’t it?”</p><p>Klaus swallows thickly, looking down at his dirty, torn up sneakers, worn out from years of use on the streets. </p><p>After the apocalypse had been successfully averted, Five had taken it upon himself to train Vanya in her powers, working with her out in the courtyard whenever she had free time between her violin lessons and rehearsals. It was clear right away that Five had seen it as a challenge to overcome, and as the weeks went by and Vanya got better with handling her powers, he was once again left without something to focus on and obsess over. Sure, Vanya still has a lot of work to do still, but her powers are no longer a mystery—there’s nothing for Five to solve anymore. </p><p>Which prompted Five to turn to Klaus, offering to train him in the same way he’d been training Vanya. </p><p>Klaus had been very hesitant at first, because he wasn’t sure anyone but himself and maybe Ben would be able to truly understand how his power works and how to reign it in. Hell, Klaus doesn’t even know much about his powers, but in the end he agreed (at Ben’s insistence) just because he knows that he’s not likely able to get his powers under control by himself, and he figured if Vanya’s improving under Five’s instruction then maybe Klaus will too. </p><p>Today had been a training day, and well, it went south pretty damn quickly. </p><p>Klaus had been standing in the courtyard with Five, Ben, and Vanya, who had come over to visit and decided to sit in on his training session—which isn’t an uncommon thing for his siblings to do. Diego and Luther both sometimes watch over training sessions, sometimes to offer help but mainly to make sure Five doesn’t go overboard with his methods and end up causing the apocalypse to happen after all. It’s a valid concern, even though Five had rolled his eyes when Luther had explained his consistent presence. </p><p>Klaus sure as hell wishes Diego had been there today.</p><p>But he wasn’t, so it was just four siblings standing in the courtyard, three living and one deceased, focusing on today’s task—making Ben corporal. Five had been hinting at it for days now, more than convinced at this point that Klaus is capable of making the ghosts corporal, eyes flashing with ambition as he would list the endless possibilities that would be made available when Klaus got a grip on his power. So then they were in the courtyard, having already been there for hours, Five watching with his arms crossed over his chest as Klaus struggled to make Ben corporal. </p><p>Klaus was… hesitant, to say the least. He had always thought of his powers like a river being held back by a dam, and the stronger his powers grow, the more the dam starts to fall apart. The consequences of the dam breaking and letting his powers loose petrifies him, so he’s not keen on speeding up the process more than he has to. If he manages to make Ben corporal, he could lose control and make every ghost in his vicinity corporal as well, and neither of them have ever thought it was worth the risk, as they both know what those ghosts are capable of if set free. </p><p>Ben hadn’t seemed thrilled today while standing in that courtyard, watching Klaus with unease as his brother attempted to make him corporal under Five’s impatient glare. “Maybe we should call it a day,” Ben had suggested to him warily.</p><p>“I couldn’t agree more,” Klaus had nodded with relief, putting his fists back down by his side. </p><p>“Why are you stopping?” Five snapped, his eyes narrowing in irritation. </p><p>“Five, we’ve been here for hours, man,” Klaus pointed out, shrinking a bit at his brother’s anger—there’s nothing scarier than a pissed off former assassin. “We’ll try again tomorrow, okay?”</p><p>“<em>Not okay</em>,” Five hissed, his fingers twitching with rage. “Try again or <em>you won’t live to see tomorrow</em>.” </p><p>Klaus gulped at the threat, knowing it should probably be taken seriously, what with the way Five was looking at him right then. Ben let out a noise of protest, but Klaus lifted his hands again, willing himself to summon the power to make Ben corporal. </p><p>But no matter how much he wanted to in that moment, he couldn’t bring himself to break the dam that’s holding his power back. </p><p>“Five, I’m sorry buddy, I can’t do it, not now,” Klaus put his hands down again, instead resolving to put his energy towards keeping Five from killing him. Five’s eye twitches, and Klaus subconsciously takes a step back. “Don’t you think that maybe you’re being a little too intense about this?”</p><p>“He’s being <em> way </em> too intense about this,” Ben commented in agreement, a frown etched into his face. </p><p>“<em>Too intense</em>? You think I’m being <em>too intense</em>?” Five snarled, his glare poisonous. “You know what was <em>intense</em>, asshole? <em>The fucking </em><em>apocalypse</em>! The same apocalypse that could kill <em>everyone on this planet </em>if we don’t all get our powers under control, so suck up whatever is holding you back from making Ben corporal and <em>do it</em> <em>now!</em>”</p><p>Vanya, having been watching nervously this whole time, stepped forward cautiously. “Five, maybe we should all cool down and try again later?”</p><p>“Five’s the only one here who needs to cool down,” Klaus had muttered, wondering if Five would track him down and kill him if he tried to make a break for it. Really, he would just need to find Luther or Diego and hope one of them could calm Five down. </p><p>Apparently, that comment was enough to make Five hit his breaking point.</p><p>“What the fuck is your <em> problem </em> ? Why is it so hard for your pea sized brain to take anything seriously, huh? I ask you to do one simple thing and you can’t even do that!” Five was shouting at that point, and Klaus, Vanya, and Ben all started backing away from him. “You have so much <em> goddamn potential </em> and you keep <em> wasting it </em> with your carelessness and fears!”</p><p>The door to the courtyard slammed open, and Diego came running towards them, Luther and Allison following close behind, the three of them looking completely bewildered at the sudden shouting. </p><p>“What the hell is going on out here?” Diego demanded, eyes darting between Five and Klaus. </p><p>Neither of them answered for a moment, more hatred and frustration in Five’s eyes than the little girl upstairs ever had in hers. He was breathing heavily as he glared into Klaus’ eyes, and Klaus honestly wished he was six feet under at that moment. </p><p>Then, Five opened his mouth again, his voice no longer a shout—it was steady, laced with the rage that he’d reigned in once the others had showed up. </p><p>“It’s time to grow the fuck up, Klaus. You’ve had twenty nine years to get over your fear of ghosts. No wonder Hargreeves always considered you a disappointment.”</p><p>Klaus felt like he’d just been punched, staggering backwards, his eyes widening. Actually, he would have preferred to be punched—it certainly would hurt less than that. It felt like he was back under his father’s scrutinizing glare, but it was so much worse because even though they all know Klaus is a disappointment, none of his siblings have ever verbalized it out loud until then. </p><p>“Whoa, whoa, whoa, what the fuck, Five?” Diego rounded on their smallest brother, and Ben had never looked so angry as he clenched and unclenched his fists. Five just gave them all one last sweeping glare before turning around and disappearing in a flash of blue. </p><p>Klaus had done his best to fake a smile and wave it off, despite his siblings’ worried looks, but Five’s words are still ringing in his ears. </p><p>“Forget about what he said, Klaus,” Ben’s voice tears him away from earlier and back to the entrance to the cemetery. He sounds more urgent now. “He was just being an asshole, you know that, right?” Klaus just shrugs, and Ben sighs. “Klaus, it’s okay to be afraid. You don’t have to push yourself—Dad tried doing that and we both know how that turned out, so let's just go home, okay?”</p><p>Ben tries to wave him in the direction they came from, but Klaus instead takes another step closer to the gates. </p><p>“Maybe he was right, though,” Klaus says quietly, reaching out to touch the bars of the gate. “I mean, it’s kind of ridiculous how I’m still afraid of my own power! I should be able to make you corporal without worrying about anything else, Ben.”</p><p>With that, Klaus slips through the gates, a chill drenching him as soon as he steps foot inside the cemetery. There are ghosts everywhere, and many of them are watching him as he and Ben start walking down the familiar dirt path, a few curious as to why the screaming, sobbing boy was back, and on his own accord without his unsympathetic father dragging him by the arm. Some whisper, some scream and wail, some just stand and stare.</p><p>“Okay, that’s fine, but there are better ways of doing that,” Ben argues as they walk. “It takes time to get rid of fears—maybe you could try therapy, or asking one of our siblings to help you. <em> Shit </em>, we didn’t tell anyone where we were going. Hey, we should go find a payphone and call Diego or someone and tell them where we are.”</p><p>“No, we’ll be fine,” Klaus shakily waves the suggestion off, feeling his heart pound in his chest, the chill getting heavier the further into the cemetery they go. Klaus can hardly hear the wind rustling the trees over the sounds of the dead. </p><p>After all these years, the mausoleum still stands tall. </p><p>Sure, it’s been weathered down since the last time Klaus had been here, a few more cracks in the foundation as its age begins to tear itself apart. The trees surrounding it have grown taller, casting larger shadows, their leaves littering the area around the mausoleum, having turned brown with death. Klaus shivers, coming to a stop, still hesitant to get too close. </p><p>“Do <em> not </em> go in there, Klaus,” Ben’s expression hardens as he realizes where they are, and he moves to stand in front of Klaus, blocking his view of the mausoleum. “You are not going to traumatize yourself just to prove Five wrong, because I can’t even put it into words how incredibly stupid that would be.” </p><p>“Like you could stop me,” Klaus says, reaching into his coat and pulling out the flashlight he brought with him. “Look, I’m just going in for a tiny bit, okay? Just a few minutes in there, no more than an hour.”</p><p>Klaus begins to approach the mausoleum, flicking the flashlight on and holding it out in front of him, and Ben looks defeated—a look Klaus has seen on his brother many, many times before. </p><p>“Okay, but just for a few minutes,” Ben agrees, as Klaus reaches the mausoleum door, probably only agreeing because he knows there’s nothing he can say to change Klaus’ stubborn mind. “If things go south we leave immediately, alright?”</p><p>“Alright, <em> mom </em>,” Klaus tries to look annoyed, but there’s fear rippling through his body as he reaches out to grab the handle of the mausoleum door, and his voice is shaking too hard for Ben not to notice. His fingers touch the cool stone, and already he can hear the whispers coming from inside. After all this time, they still sound angry. </p><p>Klaus pulls the door open, and with a deep breath, he steps inside. </p><p>“I really don’t like this,” Ben whispers as he enters the dark stone prison, ignoring the stares of the ghosts who are watching them. Klaus puts the end of the flashlight between his teeth as he begins to pull the mausoleum door shut, the door creaking loudly from years of inuse. The door shuts, closing him off from the real world, and Klaus slowly turns around to face his childhood torture cage.</p><p>Klaus puts on an uneasy smile, spreading his arms out as the ghosts begin to growl.</p><p>“I’m back,” Klaus weakly announces, swallowing thickly.</p><p>Then, he turns the flashlight off. </p><p>And the screaming, shouting, and begging begins. </p><p> </p><hr/><p> </p><p>They make it exactly thirty-four minutes before Klaus finally agrees to get the hell out of the mausoleum. Ben knows this because he’s literally been counting the seconds ever since Klaus submerged them into darkness. The ghosts who permanently reside here have not lost their intensity, and Ben is finding it harder to shove the ones who get too close to Klaus away. He’s currently sitting right next to Klaus, who is now sitting on the ground pressed up against the back wall. </p><p>“Klaus, we’ve been here long enough,” Ben yells above the voices of the dead. “We’ve proved Five wrong, so let’s go!”</p><p>Klaus doesn’t respond, and for a moment Ben worries his brother can’t hear him, but then Klaus nods in agreement, moving to stand on unsteady legs. Ben feels himself deflate with relief as Klaus stumbles over to the mausoleum door, ready to leave this place and hopefully never come back. Hopefully this experience is enough to convince Klaus to stay away for the rest of his life, because Ben doesn’t think he could bear coming back here again. </p><p>Klaus pushes on the mausoleum door, but the door doesn’t move. Ben frowns. “Push harder, Klaus,” Ben tells him, hating how useless he feels watching Klaus push on the door. “It’s just super heavy, right?”</p><p>Klaus pushes harder this time, squeezing his eyes shut as he presses his entire body against the door, the veins in his arms becoming visible as he does. </p><p>The door doesn’t budge. </p><p>Klaus looks at Ben, both of their eyes widening in horror. </p><p>“Try again,” Ben tells him, unable to stop his voice from breaking, and Klaus does, but the door doesn’t move as much as a centimeter. </p><p>Klaus stumbles back away from the door, his breathing getting heavier with each breath as the realizations set in. </p><p>“No no no <em>nonononono—” </em>there’s something wild in Klaus’ eyes as he suddenly throws himself against the door, scratching at it so hard that his fingers start to bleed, and all Ben can do is offer his words of support, try to talk Klaus down from his incoming panic attack, but that doesn’t really do much of anything, much to Ben’s horror. “Open up open up <em>open up!</em> <em>Nonononono—</em>”</p><p>The ghosts know they’re stuck. </p><p>They don’t care. </p><p>Ben stops counting the seconds. </p><p> </p><hr/><p> </p><p>The flashlight batteries go out after five hours. </p><p>At least, that’s how long Klaus thinks it takes for the light to permanently go out, submerging him into darkness once again. </p><p>As Klaus sits there, pressed against the corner of the mausoleum, knees drawn to his chest and hands over his ears, it hits him that there’s no way anyone will ever find him here. He never told anyone about his trips to the mausoleum when he was younger, thinking there wasn’t a point because he never foresaw himself being back here, trapped inside these cold, dark walls. Is he doomed to spend the rest of his life in here, until he eventually starves and finally goes back upstairs? </p><p>Surely the little girl will let him in this time, no matter how much she hates him. </p><p>It scares him, the thought of dying in here without anyone knowing, rotting with the dead as he inches closer to becoming one of them. Will Ben be able to get out? Hopefully he will, maybe he’ll start following Diego around, or Five. Both of them could use a ghost companion, even if they wouldn’t know Ben was even there. </p><p>“Ben?” Klaus whispers, his voice strained from all the screaming and sobbing, and he wonders if Ben is even able to hear him. “I’m going to die in here.”</p><p>“What? No, you’re not, I can’t—no,” Ben stumbles over whatever he’s trying to say, unable to formulate a proper sentence. “Someone… someone will come.”</p><p>Ben has always been too optimistic for his own good, has always had misplaced faith in his siblings. </p><p>Klaus goes back to blocking everything out.</p><p> </p><hr/><p> </p><p>Around the twelve hour mark is when Klaus begins to lose his grip on reality. </p><p>He’s always had one foot outside of reality, but now he’s fully outside of it as the ghosts get angrier, louder, more hysterical. It seems like more and more are crowding the already cramped mausoleum, and Klaus can’t tell where the hell they’re even coming from—he’s never in his life seen so many ghosts in here. He’s lost Ben in the crowd, and he can no longer hear his brother’s voice, and Klaus briefly wonders if that means he’s left. Klaus wouldn’t blame him—if he could phase through walls, he would have left a long ass time ago. </p><p>“<em>Look at me, Klaus, look at me, look what they did to me—</em>”</p><p><em> “I’ll kill you, you prick, I’ll kill you like she killed me—</em>”</p><p>“<em>Where is my baby? Please, my baby, where did you take him—</em>”</p><p>Klaus can hardly feel the blood drip down his face as he continues to claw at his ears, hoping they’ll fall off and he’ll be gifted with the sound of silence. </p><p>Is that too much to hope for?</p><p>Klaus hopes anyways. </p><p>“<em>K</em><em>laus! Klaus! Klaus! Klaus!—</em>”</p><p>"<em>How come you get to live? Why not me, why not my wife? </em>”</p><p>“<em> ave me please! Save me from this suffering, please, please, please—” </em></p><p>Klaus squeezes his eyes tightly shut, but somehow he can still see his father’s disappointed gaze as he stands in the entrance of the mausoleum, and it’s so akin to Five’s expression from earlier that Klaus chokes on a sob. </p><p>Why does he always have to be so afraid?</p><p>
  <em> “Look at us, look at us—” </em>
</p><p>
  <em> “Help me, you have to help me!” </em>
</p><p>
  <em> “Where is my mother, please find my mother, please sir—” </em>
</p><p>Why can’t he embrace this, like his family needs him to?</p><p>
  <em> “Please, please, please—” </em>
</p><p>
  <em> “Nononononono—” </em>
</p><p>
  <em> “Look! Look! Look! Look—” </em>
</p><p>Why can’t he make them proud?</p><p>
  <em> “Klaus!” </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Klaus, please—” </em>
</p><p>
  <em> “Klaus, help us, help us—” </em>
</p><p>He has to make them proud.</p><p>There’s a scream bouncing off the mausoleum walls, louder than all of the dead combined, and it takes a moment for Klaus to register that the scream is coming from <em> him </em>. He’s the one screaming, and power is flowing through his entire being as blue light begins to shine in the darkness, and suddenly he feels cold hands on the flesh of his neck, and then he feels so many cold hands everywhere. The ghosts are corporal, he’s made them corporal, and he has no idea how to turn it off. They’re grabbing him, clawing at him, biting him, but Klaus doesn’t even register any pain as he continues to scream and sob. He’s seconds from being torn ruthlessly apart by beings who will never see reason, and Klaus wonders if this is what Reginald would have wanted. Is he finally looking down at disappointing Number Four with a pleased face? Or will he always want more because he’s never satisfied?</p><p>Then, the pain catches up to him all at once, and he’s bleeding from so many places as the ghosts tear into him, and there’s<em> so many </em>of them.</p><p>The blue light is getting brighter and brighter as Klaus screams louder and louder, until blue is all he can see, and suddenly he feels a huge burst of power explode from deep inside him as he focuses on pushing the ghosts away, far away, and he wants to get out of here and never come back, he wants this place destroyed. </p><p>The hands disappear, and then he’s the only one screaming as the rest of the world goes silent. There’s a loud thundering <em> boom </em>that sounds as he lets out another burst of power, and in the back of his mind he prays to the little girl upstairs that Ben is okay. </p><p>He opens his eyes for the first time in hours, and he’s met with an empty mausoleum. For the first time in his life, he’s alone in the mausoleum, and he’s completely sober. </p><p>The mausoleum trembles around him, large cracks going up the walls and along the ceiling, and then huge chunks of stone are falling around him as the mausoleum begins to crumble, and everything goes dark. </p><p> </p><hr/><p> </p><p>Klaus is swimming in darkness. </p><p>Usually he hates the dark, but he isn’t bothered by this kind of dark in the slightest—it’s the safest dark he’s ever been in, and he thinks he would like to stay here for a while longer. It’s so peaceful, so comfortable, so much better than the strongest drug he’s ever taken. There’s nothing but silence, save for the slight ringing in his ears, and—</p><p>Wait. Now that he’s noticed it, the ringing in his ears is getting louder, and he shifts in discomfort, willing for it to stop. A spark of pain shoots through him, causing him to let out a whimper, and the comfortable darkness is starting to slip away from him. </p><p>“Klaus?” a voice says from somewhere outside of where he is, tone soft but urgent at the same time. “Can you hear me, man?”</p><p>Klaus knows he should probably answer whoever’s asking, but he doesn’t know how. All he wants to do is fall back into the dark. </p><p>“Klaus?” the voice asks again, and then Klaus notices a hand gently running through his hair, and then it clicks that the voice must belong to Diego.</p><p>Klaus forces his eyes open, because he would hate to disappoint his favorite brother.</p><p>Wait, Diego isn’t Klaus’ favorite brother—Ben is, in all honesty, but Ben is nowhere in sight, which is strange because Ben is always in Klaus’ sight, unless he’s high. But Klaus is sober, so where is Ben?</p><p>Klaus is awake enough to realize that he’s in the infirmary, the room dimmed but not completely dark as the light from the sun is seeping through the curtains that are pulled shut, and Diego is sitting in the chair next to his bed, watching him closely.</p><p>“Hey, bro,” Diego breathes once he sees Klaus looking at him, and Klaus notices Diego looks super tired, with dark bags hanging under his eyes. “You with me?”</p><p>“Hey, Dee,” Klaus whispers back, a smile spreading across his face at the sight of his brother being here with him. “Whatcha doin’?”</p><p>Diego doesn’t answer at first, seeming conflicted, as if he’s trying to figure out what to say. </p><p>“We found you buried under the mausoleum, Klaus,” Diego says finally, and Klaus freezes, his smile disappearing at the mention of that horrid place. “We had to dig you out. It’s a miracle you’re still alive.”</p><p>And then, suddenly, the memories start rushing back to him, so fast that it makes his head hurt and he winces. </p><p>“We got stuck inside,” Klaus mumbles, the images of… last night? They flash in his mind. The screams of the dead are still ringing in his ears. “Couldn’t get out.”</p><p>“That explains a lot,” Diego says, removing his hand from Klaus’ hair and sitting back in his chair tiredly. “Was… was Ben with you?”</p><p>Klaus nods.</p><p>“That’s good. If you hadn’t blown up the mausoleum, we may not have found you,” Diego admits, looking haunted by the events of the last few days, even though he’s not the one who can see ghosts. “We saw a huge burst of blue light all the way from here and knew it was you. We got there as fast as we could, I—I didn’t think—”</p><p>Diego cuts himself off, not physically able to finish that sentence. Instead, he grabs Klaus’ hand, giving it one last squeeze before standing up. </p><p>“I’m gonna go get Mom,” Diego tells him, and with one last lingering look Diego turns around and walks out the infirmary door, leaving the door wide open in his wake. </p><p>Klaus lies there in silence, listening to the steady beeps of the heart monitor he’s connected to, trying to recall everything that led up to him ending up here, but he’s blanking on a lot of parts. Why had he gone to the mausoleum of all places? Is Ben okay, and if he is, where the hell is he?</p><p>One of his questions is answered by Ben suddenly appearing next to his bed, eyes wide as he notices Klaus is awake. Klaus opens his mouth to ask where he went, but the words die in his throat as Ben looks up towards the door, shifting with unease. Klaus turns his head towards the doorway.</p><p>Five is standing there, stiff and unmoving as he stares at Klaus. He looks… horrible, to say the least, with bloodshot eyes that are pooling with guilt—an emotion Klaus has never seen Five exhibit before, but Klaus isn’t sure why Five would feel guilty. His black hair is a mess, strands sticking up in different directions like he’d been tugging at it for long periods of time. The last time Klaus had seen his brother look like this is when he was dealing with the apocalypse, and even then he hadn’t looked as distraught as he does right now. </p><p>Despite the deathly serious vibes rolling off both Five and Ben, Klaus smiles tiredly, just simply happy that his brother decided to come visit him while Diego is gone momentarily. “Hey, Five-o!”</p><p>“Hey, Klaus,” Five takes a few cautious steps towards his bed. Klaus wracks his brain, trying to figure out why Five is acting so strange, but nothing comes up. He glances over at Ben, who is watching Five closely, and suddenly Five’s angry, disappointed face pops up in his mind and—oh.</p><p>He doesn’t remember exactly what happened, but he recalls Five being disappointed with him because he couldn’t make Ben corporal.</p><p>“Five, I did it!” Klaus grins excitedly at his brother, who furrows his eyebrows at those words. “I made them corporal in the mausoleum—all of them! Wish you coulda’ seen it…”</p><p>Five, however, does not look as pleased as Klaus thought he would be. Instead he gives a hesitant nod, the frown on his face not easing up.</p><p>“They scratched you up pretty good,” Five points out, nodding towards the bandages wrapped around multiple parts of Klaus’ body—arms, legs, even his throat. </p><p>“Yeah,” Klaus agrees, holding up one of his bandaged arms in the air to study it. “Those ghosts don’t like me very much…”</p><p>Five doesn’t say anything, just looks down at his feet as he shifts his weight, his hands stuffed into the pockets of his uniform. </p><p>“Five? Why the long face?” Klaus asks, confused as to why his usually confident brother seems so uncomfortable. In the hallway, the sounds of Mom’s heels and Diego’s voice are getting closer, and Klaus can’t wait for them to get here if only to break this weird tension that Klaus doesn’t even understand. </p><p>“I… I’m… I’m sorry, Klaus,” Five’s voice is hardly raised above a whisper, refusing to meet Klaus’ eyes. “I’m sorry for saying all those things, I didn’t mean them. I just have a lot of—issues regarding the apocalypse and I took it all out on you.”</p><p>Klaus just stares, eyes wide and his smile gone.</p><p>“I shouldn’t have pushed you into doing something you weren’t ready to do,” Five continues, glancing over at the doorway where Diego and Mom have yet to appear. “And I’m just… I’m sorry.”</p><p>Like he does whenever things like <em> feelings </em> get involved, Five turns around and blinks out of the room in a flash of blue, leaving Klaus and Ben completely dumbfounded as Grace walks into the infirmary, Diego close behind. She greets him, her voice cheery as always, but Klaus can’t do anything but stare at the spot Five had just been standing in, bits and pieces of yesterday’s argument coming back to him.</p><p>Klaus doesn’t see Five the rest of the time he’s in the infirmary. </p><p> </p><hr/><p> </p><p>The minute Klaus gets officially released from the infirmary, he forces Ben to try and play patty cake with him. </p><p>Ben doesn’t seem all too thrilled at Klaus’ newfound determination to make him corporal, the night in the mausoleum a little over a week ago clearly still on his mind (Klaus tries to convince himself that he’s moved on, but the nightmares say differently), but Klaus doesn’t give him the option to back out. He’s so close to being able to control his powers, and honestly, Klaus is tired of the longing looks Ben gives their siblings when he thinks Klaus is turned away. </p><p>Being able to hug his brother after seventeen years would just be an amazing bonus. </p><p>It’s proving to be a lot harder than either of them thought it would be, and after three days of trying to summon the same power he’d used a week ago with no results, Klaus is beginning to get frustrated—but he doesn’t worry too much, because he’s sure he’ll be able to improve once his training starts up again. </p><p>Speaking of his training, Klaus has hardly seen Five in the last week, only getting brief glimpses of his smallest brother before he disappears in a flash of blue. </p><p>“You’d think he’s avoiding me or something,” Klaus says to Ben confusedly after watching Five disappear from the kitchen as soon as he enters it. </p><p>“You’d think,” Ben echoes, but even though he doesn’t seem puzzled in the slightest he’s apparently decided not to share with the class what he knows. </p><p>Given that he hasn’t seen much of Five recently, Klaus has no idea when his training is going to resume. He waits a week for Five to finally approach him and discuss it with him, but when that seventh day comes and goes with no word from the ex assassin Klaus finally concludes that Five isn’t planning on talking to him. He would think Five is waiting for Klaus to bring up the subject, but Five won’t even stick around long enough for Klaus to do that, so he just feels stuck. </p><p>Klaus finally decides to get a tad more aggressive about it when he looks out the window and sees Five and Vanya in the courtyard training, having just failed another game of patty cake with Ben. </p><p>“He’s at the bar,” Ben reports to him later in the day, glancing over at Klaus from where he’s hiding just outside the entrance of the living room. “He doesn’t seem to be doing much so it’ll be harder for him to make up an excuse to leave.”</p><p>Klaus nods in understanding before quickly popping out of his hiding spot.</p><p>“Hey, <em> mi hermano</em>!” Klaus greets Five cheerily, and Five almost spills his drink when he jumps at Klaus’ sudden entrance. Five eyes him warily over his martini as Klaus approaches the bar, hopping onto the stool next to him. “How’ve you been, little buddy?”</p><p>Five sets the martini down onto the counter, staring straight down into his glass. </p><p>“Don’t call me little,” Five mutters, but he doesn’t sound as angry as he usually gets when any of them make fun of his height. </p><p>“So, it’s been two weeks,” Klaus taps his fingers on the surface of the courter rhythmically, not for the first time kind of wishing his sobriety didn’t include alcohol. “When are we gonna get back into the swing of things? I’m so close to making Ben corporal, you know, so we should probably work on that first. I mean, only if you think that’s what we should do, I’m down with whatever—”</p><p>“If you need help with training, talk to Luther or Diego,” Five cuts his ramble off, and Klaus’ expression morphs into one of surprise. </p><p>“Uh… what?” Klaus laughs nervously, because Five isn’t serious, right? He can’t be. “Why would I ask them? Don’t tell me you booked my training time with someone else. That’s my time fair and square, man.”</p><p>Five slides off the stool, drink gripped tightly in his hand. </p><p>“Ask them because I am no longer responsible for your training,” Five says stiffly, and Klaus is truly stumped at that.</p><p>Five turns around, presumably about to jump away, and it starts to dawn on Klaus that something is seriously wrong. Klaus knows their last training session went horrible, but he didn’t realize it made Five so angry that he’s now refusing to continue. Klaus doesn’t even want to entertain the idea of Luther or Diego training him—even though Five has a short fuse, he’s the most knowledgeable about Klaus’ powers, and his other two living brothers are too big of boneheads to be able to understand how his powers work. No, Five is the best option, and Klaus needs to get him back on board.</p><p>“Wait, hey, Five, please don’t give up on me,” Klaus swallows thickly, standing up as well, and Five’s form goes still—a good sign, because Five still hasn’t flashed away. Maybe he can still fix this mess. “I’m really sorry that I’ve been being difficult—I’ve never been good with my powers and I have a lot of work to do, but I <em> promise </em> I’ll take things more seriously. I’m sorry for being a pain, but I’ll be better, I swear!”</p><p>Five sighs and turns back around to face him, and this is one of those rare times when Klaus can actually see his brother's age etched into his face—despite his young face, he looks old, and so, so tired. </p><p>“Klaus, it’s not your fault—don’t apologize,” Five tells him, his tone laced with frustration, and Klaus just wants to <em> understand. </em></p><p>“Five, what’s going on?” Klaus is one step away from begging for answers, because he feels like he’s being left in the dust, and Ben certainly isn’t offering any help from where he’s leaning against the bar. "Are you sure it's not my fault? Because I can't think of anything—"</p><p>“Do you not remember how I lost my temper?” Five suddenly snaps, and Klaus recoils. Realizing his temper is flaring up once again, Five takes a deep breath and levels out his voice. “I took training you as a challenge, and when I got frustrated I took it out on you and that hurt you a lot more than you’re willing to admit. I’m not going to risk that happening again, understood? I’m not the person you need, Klaus—you need someone like Diego who knows how to handle you.”</p><p>A chuckle escapes Klaus as he sits back down at the bar. “”Know how to handle me”? Five,<em> no one </em> knows how to “handle” me, besides Ben maybe. But besides that, I’m not fragile, and you don’t have to treat me like it.”</p><p>Five doesn’t seem convinced, and when he disappears from where he’s standing Klaus is sure Five’s gone and he’s lost his chance, but then Five reappears behind the bar and sets the glass down onto the counter. Klaus swivels around on his stool as Five stands there awkwardly, his hands back in his pockets now that there’s nothing in them. </p><p>“Look, I won’t lie to you, the things you said did sting a lot,” Klaus admits, and Five flinches at the admission. “But you said sorry and that you didn’t mean it so it’s okay, old man. News flash, you’re not the first in this family to say shitty things to each other.” Klaus’ gaze drifts over to Ben, who’s staring at the ground. “God knows I’ve said some horrible things in the past.”</p><p>“That doesn’t make it right, moron,” Five rolls his eyes, but his words hold no bite. “I didn’t spend forty-five years trying to get back to you all only to hurt one of you whenever things don’t go my way. I need to be <em> better</em>, but I’m <em> not</em>, so I can’t be what you need me to be.”</p><p>For as long as Klaus can remember, Five has always had a burning need to be perfect, to be the best, and anything less is simply considered unacceptable. The word “adequate” has never been a title Five is willing to settle for, and Klaus thinks that must be exhausting—but then, Klaus has never felt any desire to be the best at anything. Still, it’s surprising how dissatisfied Five still is, despite the fact that he’s literally survived an apocalypse and the Commission—or maybe it’s not, given his history. </p><p>“Five, you’re not perfect—and you don’t have to be,” Klaus says, voice soft. “We all have bad days, okay? And, if you’re not gonna train me then I’m just going to train myself, which may or may not go very badly considering Ben and I have no idea what we’re doing.”</p><p>Five grimaces, probably at the thought of Klaus and Ben blindly messing around with Klaus’ powers, and Klaus hopes that image is enough to sway Five into helping him again. He doesn’t know what he’ll do if Five says no. He’ll probably just continue to beg and annoy him into saying yes, but that would take up energy Klaus doesn’t want to use if he doesn’t have to. </p><p>“Please, Five?” Klaus adds on for good measure, peering at his brother with the big puppy eyes he always uses with Diego. The puppy eyes always work on Diego—they’re Klaus’ secret weapon. </p><p>They never work on Ben, unfortunately. </p><p>But apparently, his use of the puppy eyes are successful on ex assassins, because after a minute of serious contemplation Five relents. “Fine, okay, but we’re taking things slow at first, got it?”</p><p>“Got it, favorite brother of mine!” Klaus cheers, ignoring Ben’s noise of protest, though his ghost brother seems more relaxed than he’d been a few minutes ago. </p><p>“Just… make sure to tell me if I’m getting too intense. I promise I’ll listen to you this time,” Five says, still seeming a bit on edge. Then, his shoulders deflate, and there’s a soft look of youthful desperation in his eyes as he keeps them trained on the empty martini glass in front of him. He seems strangely vulnerable. “The point of this is for me to help you, not to hurt you. I’m bad at picking up on feelings so you need to tell me if I’m being mean or pushy.”</p><p>“Maybe… maybe you just need training in people skills?” Klaus suggests, and Five looks up, raising an eyebrow humorously. “And luckily for you, my schedule is free for people skills training every weekday at four pm, so whaddya say? Wanna sign up? I promise to go easy on you… at first.”</p><p>Five does something rare. </p><p>He smiles. </p><p>It’s a real, soft, genuine smile that has never been given to anyone besides Vanya or Ben. </p><p>“Sure, I’ll sign up,” Five agrees, and Klaus isn’t sure if he’s actually serious about that or not, but the fact that he’s willing to work on his issues is progress in his book. </p><p>They all have issues they need to work on—the result of Reggie’s fantastic parenting—but they’re working together to fix themselves and each other. Klaus has always yearned for his powers to go away and disappear forever, but now, with his brother’s help, he thinks he can finally be able to rein them in and take control for the first time in his life. Five certainly has faith in him. </p><p>The mausoleum is now nothing more than a pile of rubble, but Klaus still stands strong. </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>As always, feedback is always appreciated :)</p></blockquote></div></div>
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